Parenting struggles...

Well. Life is good - my back is clearly on the mend - 3 visits to the chiropractor and he had it completely in alignment - as evidenced by the wonderful relaxing stretches at tai chi class the other day. Health is great - eating well, keeping a daily food log (have been for the past 5 wks) and exercising regularly (I'll be rowing 7 kms today, about 35 mins, to make my goal of 100 kms for this month). All in all, life is great.

Having a bit of an issue with parenting, though, and if you can help me out here, I'd so appreciate it. One of my children quite regularly pouts if they don't get their way - things like slamming doors, stomping off, leaving the room, and generally displaying anger. It is to a point where it is affecting friendships, as in one of their friends no longer wants to play with them because of this behaviour (this particular friend bottles everything up inside, fwiw). I have spoken with other parents who know my child well, and none feel that this is a major issue, but some do recognize this behaviour in my child. I've been told from some parents that my child will outgrow this behaviour, but from personal experience, I'm shaken up. See, I feel like I was exactly like this as a child, so I can see what's happening here, but it's breaking my heart that the friends aren't willing to give my child a second chance. And furthermore, I feel like it took the greater part of my youth to really get a grasp on the rollercoasters that are my emotions. Only in the last, say 10 or 15 years, have I really begun to handle conflict and emotions well - oh, I still get my feathers ruffled occasionally, but certainly not on a daily or hourly basis like I recall in childhood. I don't want my child to go through their entire childhood struggling with this. I've talked about it with my child - the reason their friend has stopped calling - and it's really hurting my child's feelings. How can I help my child see the consequences of their actions, and help them to make a change (if they're willing to)? Also, when I look back at my own childhood, I wonder how the food I was eating affected my behaviour. And so I wonder if I shouldn't talk to my child about cutting out certain foods - certainly sugar, perhaps even wheat or dairy, and see if that won't help them somehow (off the top of my head I don't think sugar is a major issue, but wheat or dairy could very well be). However, I would certainly seek medical advice (probably both Dr & Naturopath) before doing this. Anyhow, your thoughts on this would be greatly appreciated.

Sighhhhh
~n~

Dreams....

yesterday my son told me he had a dream that i was lying in bed and had had a baby overnight, unbeknownst to me!! I laughed. he wondered what the dream 'meant' - that i won't have anymore children? that i will? i think it's probably something like a new project or interest or something will be created by me, and since i'm not planning on creating or starting anything today or anytime soon, it WILL be a bit of a surprise if i DO. LOL

last night i had a bizarre dream. i was out on a boat, apparently a coast guard boat (LOL) where i was working/volunteering. someone from my past (yes i know who it was) was in charge of the boat and so we were out on this boat (others as well) and this other boat we were following was in danger. it was a sailboat and had flipped underwater but the crew was fine - they managed to flip it back upright. i had a folder of papers and stuff with me so before i jumped into the water to help (wth?) i tossed my binder or folder onto the chair in the cabin and then jumped into the water to assist. turns out my 'assistance' actually ended up flipping the sailboat back underwater - i guess i wasn't as helpful as i intended, LOL - but the crew once again managed to re-flip it upright. pretty funny. but as i got back onto the boat, this person from my past had gone into the cabin and got my folder off the chair and was rifling through it!! i was shocked. he took something i was intending to mail to someone else (a gift my son had bought for someone with his own money) and opened it up and spilled the contents out into the water. i was so upset - i said, 'my son bought that with his own money! he's going to be so upset!' the dream continued on inside an army building (again, i'm LOL here), but nothing ever got resolved.

i woke up and spent a great deal of time thinking about relationships - about this person from my past, about relationships between people, between groups of people, between countries. As i lay there, i could see how i had something to learn from everyone who has come into and through my life and i reflected on many people and what lesson i had learned about myself from them. i began to think about the chinese & tibetans and the conflict there and a wellspring of compassion grew inside me for both the chinese and tibetan people. i kept thinking about various people and relationships and the meaning and growth they've offered to me. hmmmm... so that's how i started my day.

namaste
~n~

cREaTiVe jUicEs fLoWinG...

Oh yes, I've had a lovely, bliss-filled day... really feeling the support of the universe, just feeling like Everything is where it should be... that life is being guided... it's been wonderful. Smiling while going about my day, periodically, for no apparent reason at all, other than I am so filled with gratitude for this moment. I taught tai chi this morning and had a fantastic time - the students are great. We laugh, we have fun, we learn from each other. It's really cool. Then I picked my kids up from my friend, and wow, she is such an inspirational and kind spirit. I just have so much admiration for her. We chatted at length; I so enjoyed our conversation.

She had gone to Seedy Saturday on the weekend and found out that one acre will yield one metric ton (tonne?) of wheat. Isn't that crazy?! So then we started doing calculations in our heads - how much wheat do our families consume in one year?! Well, I'm guessing we go through maybe 300 lbs of wheat in a year between 4 of us (max 300, I'm thinking it's closer to 250). So I'm thinking... and correct me if my math is off here - that on one acre, you could feed about 3 families, each consuming ~300 lbs? So really, I'd only need to plant 1/2 acre to feed our family quite securely for a year with wheat. AND... there's a local mill (within 100 kms)! That's fantastic!! She and I were both so pleased. Although I am a committed raw vegan, the other 3 members of this household all consume wheat products, so it would be so nice to have a local, organic source of the grain - not to mention think about how much $$ we'd save over a year!! Our wheat/flour prices through our food co-op have TRIPLED this past year. It's crazy. My friend and I continued to talk about farming and our plans for this year.

Exercise:
I rowed another 6 kms today as well as doing tai chi for an hour this morning in class.

Today I've eaten/drank:

• 1.5L of green smoothie (I had 3/4L around 10 a.m. and 3/4L around 2 p.m.),
• 1/2 an avocado and a tomato diced up together with a little salt and nama shoyu on it,
• a few flax crackers,
• and 3 1/2 L of water with lemon (began the day with 48 oz (~1.5L) before making the smoothie).

In the super-packed green smoothie I put:

• 5 pieces of kale,
• 2 tbsp ground flax,
• 1 banana,
• 1c frozen blueberries,
• 1.5c frozen raspberries,
• 1 tbsp maca powder,
• 1/4 tsp camu camu powder,
• 1 tsp goji berry powder,
• 1 tbsp cacao nibs,
• 1 tbsp cacao powder,
• 1 tbsp agave nectar,
• 1 tbsp shredded coconut,
• 1 tbsp cashews,
• 2c of sesame milk and
• ~2c of water.

Why so many additions to the smoothie? Well, I guess I figure I want the most bang for the buck, as it were, the most nutrition in the smoothie. Read on to find out more about each ingredients purported benefits... and then go and make a green smoothie! ;)

Kale is obviously, a dark leafy green. The many benefits of dark leafy greens are well known:
Kale provides more nutritional value for fewer calories than almost any other food around. Kale has sulfur-containing phytonutrients, which are thought to prevent cancers. Kale is also thought to aid in detoxification and cleansing. The carotenoids kale contains aid in lowering the risk of cataracts. Kale contains vitamin A, promotes lung health, contains vitamin C, supports the immune system, protects against arthritis. Kale is a good source of fiber, a very good source of calcium, vitamin E (slowing the loss of mental functioning), and protects against many forms of cancer.

Ground flax seeds are said to be high in alpha linolenic acid, omega-3 (good) fat. Ground flax protects against heart disease, cancer and diabetes. It is rich in beneficial fiber and boosts the immune system, helps manage weight, enhances memory, mood and attention. Ground flax helps lower cholesterol, has anti-inflammatory effects, lowers the risk of breast cancer, fights constipation, IBS, and diarrhea. It reduces symptoms of menopause and helps with asthma, migraines and arthritis.

Bananas are full of potassium, which helps keep your heart and nervous system in good shape. They are good for your kidneys (minimizing the risk of kidney stones) and bones (reducing the risk of osteoporosis). Bananas contain the amino acid tryptophan (also found in turkey, it acts as a mild sedative and has a calming effect on the brain). Bananas are high in B6 (essential for antibody production, B6 increases immune functioning), and help the body make hemoglobin, as well as being a good source of fiber.

Berries are of course full of antioxidants. Berries contain folic acid, vitamin C, and other important minerals and phytochemicals. Blueberries protect against bladder infections and also lower cholesterol and are thought to be antifungal, antiseptic and anti-inflammatory. Blueberries improve balance, coordination and memory. Blueberries and raspberries (as well as other berries) may reduce your risk of cancer. Blueberries and raspberries contain lutein, important for good vision.

Maca powder is thought to increase energy, endurance, stamina, sexual functioning, libido and fertility. It's thought to alleviate chronic fatigue syndrome, regulate hormonal imbalances, aid in alleviating depression, giving a feeling of well-being, reduce anxiety and stress, enhance memory, learning and mental ability, reduce anemia, accelerate healing, and have a beneficial action on the circulatory system. It is good for healthy teeth and bones, gives the skin a more youthful glow, is non-addictive, and is antibacterial, antifungal, anticarcinogen, and antioxidant.

Camu Camu Berry Powder is a really concentrated source of vitamin C - 1/8 tsp a day is all you need. It is thought to protect the nervous system from degenerative diseases, protect the eyes from macular degeneration, aid in the prevention of Alhzeimer's and dementia, improve cognitive performance and mental focus, prevent depression, migraines, and infertility.

Goji or wolf berries are thought to help eyesight, protect the liver, boost the immune system, and increase circulation. The berries are rich in antioxidants, particularly carotenoids, including beta-carotene and zeaxanthin. Zeaxanthin in particular may decrease the risk of glaucoma and age-related macular degeneration (AMD). Goji berries may also reduce blood glucose and lower cholesterol levels. Goji berries contain a good source of carbohydrates, protein, fat and dietary fiber, and also contain many essential nutrients and minerals such as calcium, potassium, iron, zinc, vitamin C, beta-carotene, zeaxanthin, vitamin B2, selenium, and several amino acids.

Raw cacao contains a high level of flavonoids, which may have beneficial cardiovascular health effects. Raw cacao is thought to lower cholesterol levels, protect against heart disease and cancer. It may have important benefits for the brain in terms of learning and memory. Raw cacao contains large amounts of antioxidants (nearly twice as much as red wine and three times as much as in green tea). It also contains magnesium, iron, chromium, vitamin C, and zinc. Raw cacao may reduce blood pressure.

Raw agave nectar is a natural sweetener that is low-glycemic (meaning it doesn't spike blood sugar levels) and is safe for type II diabetics (only stevia and agave share this honour). It is recommended for anti-candida yeast diets.

Coconut is a stable source of dietary fat. It is thought to be thyroid stimulating and have anti-aging effects. The thyroid stimulation is said to aid in weight loss. Coconut is thought to be antimicrobial/antiseptic and also be an anticarcinogen.

Cashews are a good source of iron (improving red blod cell function & enzyme activity), magnesium (promotes energy release and bone growth), phosphorus (builds bones and teeth), zinc (essential to digestion and metabolism) and selenium (has important antioxidant properties, thus protecting the body from cancer). Cashews are also good sources of protein.
Of course cashews are also cholesterol-free. Cashews also contain phytochemicals with antioxidant properties that protects the body from cancer and heart disease.

Sesame milk is said to remove intestinal worms and pus formations (gross). Sesame seeds are a good source of vitamin E, helping to strengthen the heart and nervous system. Sesame seeds are also said to protect against liver damage and high blood pressure. Half a cup of sesame seeds has 3x more calcium than half a cup of whole milk. Sesame oil can be applied externally to babies to remove cradle cap, and can also be used externally to remove wrinkles.

On to the next book....

So now I'm reading Living Simply with Children and I am really enjoying it. I can't remember the author but I am really resonating with the concept of living simply - of living a life in accordance with one's values. This is very meaningful to me. :) I'll write more later - I am intending to get dressed today (lol - yesterday was a pajama day) and exercise and basically get the day going. So you'll forgive me for not writing more, but I'll edit this post later and continue on... And fwiw, my back is definitely on the mend... I was able to row 6 kms yesterday and will go to the chiropractor twice this week as well. A little sore/stiff when sitting for long periods (hence this short post) but feels good to keep it moving.

namaste'
~n~

Healthy Living

I was reading Udo Erasmus's 'Fats that Heal, Fats that Kill' this afternoon and wow, what a great read that is. What really resonated with me was what he wrote about longevity (p 379):

"A long life is the cumulative result of doing a lot of little things right. It results from a balance of the following factors:

• fuels that build the fire of life necessary to keep cells active and clean;
• antioxidants that provide spark control;
• avoidance of external and internal toxic influences;
• digestive efficiency;
• optimally functioning bowel flora;
• the right kinds of fiber that keep our colon clean;
• clean water to drink and bathe in;
• clean air;
• sunlight;
• physical activity that keeps our body fit;
• rest and relaxation;
• challenges worth meeting;
• good feeling about oneself;
• positive goals and constructive activities;
• mutually supportive relationships;
• a clean and natural environment;
• independence in thinking and livelihood;
• emotionally healthy beliefs;
• a sense of humour;
• faith in nature, life, and the human body;
• enjoyment of our own life;
• positive regard for life in general."

I wholeheartedly agree with him on every one of those points. And really, how many of those are we able to control or influence? So many. He goes on, a short while later, to discuss the concept of conscious living (p 403):

"Living consciously means being aware of our feelings, emotions, and thoughts; being aware of the actions that flow from emotions and thoughts; being aware of the consequences of our actions, and learning from these consequences. Living consciously is necessary for realizing today, in our life, what we imagine were the 'good old days' or what we hope will be the 'better future'. Living consciously has always required the effort of being aware, present, alert, and deliberate. While the circumstances in which we face the challenge of living consciously change, conscious living is simply a question of values, priorities, and commitments. Conscious living has always been, is, and always will be possible for any person, under any set of circumstances - a matter of deciding and choosing how we live."

I love that last sentence - conscious living is available to us all, in every moment. Are you up for that - for the challenge of choosing conscious living in THIS moment? I sure am. That one goal - living consciously - is what fuels me, is what wakes me up with a smile on my face every day - I think it's possibly the very best thing that I can aspire to - that I can role model for my children - to live consciously, responsibly, and in the present moment. After all, my life is good. SOOOO good. And I am SO grateful for every aspect of it. I'm not looking backwards at some 'good ol' days', nor do I spend time fantastizing about the future that is yet to come... sure I think about it, I make goals and plans and such, but it is not what my life is about. Life is here, now, and it's damn good. Even with a sore back, lol.

And check out this crazy statistic (p 405): "In 1815, sugar consumption was 15 pounds per person per year. In 1865, human beings consumed about 40 pounds of sugar per year. By 1900, sugar consumption had risen to 85 pounds per person per year. In 1970, sugar consuption was about 120 pounds per person per year, and today (1993) it stands at 135 pounds (61 kilos) per person per year." That is beyond incredible. It's a tad horrid, don't you think? I wonder what it is today - 16 years later?

Chapters 90 (The biological basis of natural therapies) and 91 (Health as Wholeness) really spoke to me, too. But I'll leave you with that... just check the book out sometime if you are so inclined. :)

namaste'

Musings on good health...

my back has been out since sunday night/monday morning.... after that stressful day. :( it was so bad i..... i.... i confess i took an extra-strength muscle relaxant yesterday (me, who can count on her hands how many tylenol she's taken in the last decade). BOY are those things ever strong!! i walked around in a muscle-relaxant-induced-haze for several hours, oblivious to the pain my body was in... until it wore off and i was in even more pain afterwards. Still sore this morning i opted for taking yet another MR and later spent over an hour in the local pool's hot tub. now i feel GREAT but don't want to count my chickens until they hatch... if i feel great tomorrow then i'll get back at rowing and tai chi. but whoowee i hope i don't ever have to take medication of any kind ever again. i am so grateful for my health and for raw food. i am certain i am recovering faster because i'm not consuming deadened, cooked food as well, expecting my body to heal and also use the enzymes which should be going towards healing for food digestion. Nourishing myself with living foods is certainly a major part of the ticket to good health.

Update on Thursday: my back felt fine last night, so of course I did housework, even rowed on the rowing machine. Woke up this morning very sore again... however a visit to the chiropractor today has me on the mend now, I think.

Isn't it funny how we take our health for granted? How we will eat whatever's in front of us - burger, fries, beer, whatever... because the effects of such a meal will take so LONG to become apparent that we are too slow to realize once our health goes awry what the connection between that meal was and our now ill health. It is so EASY to disregard the importance of regular physical exercise, or of eating well (and by that I mean raw, living foods & pure water). It's just so much easier to eat crap and procrastinate and make excuses why we can't exercise... why it's not so important. Well, it's preventative. Today the chiropractor said I should have no problems living 'til I'm 100. WAHOO. Whether he's right or wrong isn't the point; the point is that I'm on the road to good health. Good health is not a goal that you achieve; it's a journey, a process. You can always improve your health, but if you don't take those steps towards good health, you'll backslide and slip. Falling off the wagon isn't the end of the world, but it means you're going the wrong way on the one-way road to good health.

So what things do you do to ensure good health? Not smoking? Abstaining from drugs? From alcohol? From certain foods - be it meat, dairy, common allergenic foods like wheat, gluten, soy, corn, peanuts, from cooked foods, choosing only raw, live, vegan foods? Do you exercise regularly? What types of exercise do you do - stretches, aerobic, muscle building and strength training? Do you practise good dental hygiene (did you know doing just that can increase your life expectancy by a full DECADE?!?! So go floss!!!) Do you feed your mind the way you nourish your body - doing brain-building exercises like Sudoku or crosswords? do you read regularly, do you challenge your brain? Do you limit things like violent media images and shows and instead nourish your self with images of a world you are here to create - a peaceful, compassionate, loving world? Do you surround yourself with community - with the loving support of others and do you offer that to others as well? Do you spend time outdoors every day in the fresh air and sunshine? Do you spend time in nature? in solitude? in silence? Do you regularly reflect on your life, on your goals? Do you keep the big picture of life in mind? What do YOU do to ensure your good health?

If wishes were fishes...

...I can't remember how that ends. LOL Anyways I'm in a wishin' mood, so I'm gonna put this out there, into the Loving and Compassionate Universe:

I want a juicer. Not just any juicer. A Green Star juicer.
And I want a 9-tray Excalibur dehydrator.
I'd like to win the 6/49. It's $39 million, I think. Yes, I have a ticket. ;)
I'd like to be able to order the raw food items on my wishlist, the ones I'm out of.

Apart from that, I really can't think of too much I need or want. (Note that the above are definitely wants, not needs).
I am grateful to have my health and the health of those I love, a roof over my head, clothes, a loving and supportive family, and so much more.
I am grateful for a sense of stability and security and safety in my life.
I am grateful all my needs are met.
I am grateful to have access to all the clean pure water I can drink.
I am grateful for nourishing, healing raw foods in abundance.
I am grateful for my education, for being a literate woman in this world today. So many many people aren't able to read these very words.
I am grateful for the support of the Universe.
I am grateful for this moment.
I gratefully acknowledge that we, all the living beings on this beautiful planet, are all ONE.

Namaste'
~n~

A Day of Emotions... and Growth

It's been an emotional day, dealing with a conflict. It's funny, because my emotional outlook has been so positive for so long now that I can't actually recall the last time I felt bummed about anything. Seriously. I've been feeling so content. And I realized that as the conflict unfolded this morning that I was struggling against acknowledging my emotions about the situation. When I did, I got upset... naturally, as it was an upsetting situation. Anyways, I had to allow myself to release the emotions and thought and thought and thought..... Eventually I decided I was wasting my time worrying about the situation (thank you Reiki; Just for Today, I will not Worry) and got on with enjoying the day. I began reading Raw Emotions (Angela Stokes) and reading about our emotions helped me see where I was at much more clearly. I took a moment, wrote down how I wanted the situation resolved, and wrote "I am happy, content, and at peace with every aspect of my life." Moments later the phone rang and I was able to find out more information about the conflict.... important information that had not been previously shared. The phone call COMPLETELY changed the way I was looking at the conflict and suddenly, in an instant, I was overcome with relief. Tears filled my eyes as I realized how much the Universe supports us in every moment. Truly, we are not insignificant. Unbelievable. I cried with relief and released all the emotions I was harbouring about the situation.

I was conscious today every time I ate whether I was eating because I was truly hungry, or whether I was eating because I felt stressed (which I admit I have a tendency to do). I drank more than 4L of water and had 3/4 L of delicious spinach, apple, ginger juice this morning.

Every moment there is an opportunity for us to grow. I am so grateful for today. My life has been rolling along, with relative ease as of late. I was beginning to wonder where the opportunity is for growth when things aren't shaken up. lol Be mindful what you think of, eh. I am so grateful. For my family, for my health, for consciousness and awareness, for the laughter of children and smiles on their faces... when they laugh and giggle, for their love and caring. I am grateful for conflict and turmoil. And I am grateful that support is only a phone call (and intention shared with the Universe) away. :)

namaste
~n~

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day to one and all! And a very very happy birthday to my little girl! How can she be 5 already?! Does time ever go by fast! Seems like just yesterday she was born... such a peaceful birth (spends a moment remembering...). :) We had a really nice birthday lunch for her, with 3 out of 4 grandparents here. She opened cards and gifts and got a new bicycle which she seems pretty excited about. dh is @ work so we'll celebrate a belated Valentine's Day (and also his birthday) on Tuesday... ;) It really is birthday season around here. 3 birthdays in as many weeks.

I had a piece of cake today - heart-shaped lemon cake with chocolate & lemon icing - and I feel absolutely icky now. I've had 3L of water, 2 nori rolls with lots of veggies in them (yummers) and a grapefruit & a banana earlier but that cake was toooooo much, despite being made with organic everything (org sucanut, org wht flour, org egg, org milk, etc). lol I'm either gonna have to go lie down until it wears off or maybe I should try rowing instead and sweat it out. self-inflicted, I know. silly silly silly

I'm reading Ms. Stokes' Raw Emotions right now... great book - highly recommend it. Grab it over at www.rawreform.com Also still reading the Hobbit with the children. I'm hoping to read the Anastasia series with them as well... not sure if our library carries those or not - I'll have to check.

OOO and don't I have the best mummy in the whole entire world!!! She bought me a new pair of Mavi jeans today! Just LOVE those jeans. You can find them at Salts Organic Boutique. I'm telling you they make you feel sooooooo fantastic. I own 2 pairs of jeans - one old grubby pair for working outside and the other is my Mavi's that I wear pretty much constantly when I go out in public. LOL Love 'em, Love 'em, Love 'em.

Check out Farewell my Subaru. The book is a great read. :)

Well, have a luverly Valentine's Day! The day doesn't have to be all about mushy romance. Instead, make it a day to be grateful for the many friends in your life that support you and care for you. May you be the giver and receiver of much loving-kindness today. :)
~n~

Lovin' the Aquarian Groove...

Alright, so 3 out of 4 people in this house are Aquarians. And wouldn't you know it but Jupiter is in Aquarius this year, which apparently, astrologically speaking, only happens once every 12 years.... the last time this happened was in 1997 (note to self: the year we married, the year I graduated from university, the year I got a job). Basically, all the horoscopes for Aquarius for 2009 say similar things: "This is YOUR year. Dream big." Only a lot more eloquently than that. lmao Can I just say how much I'm LOVIN' it already?! A huge WAHOOOOO for the astrological line-up this year! fanTAStic! Oh, and those who know me know I always dream big. I'm the dreamiest Aquarian of 'em all. LOL well-designed passive solar cob houses, composting toilets, going off-grid, permaculture, rainwater harvesting, self-sufficiency growing my own food with a raw vegan diet, alternative transportation, raising children with a philosophy of respect and loving guidance, homeschooling/lifelong learning, a supportive community with like-minded people... it's all me, baby, it's all me. ;) sure, us Aquarians are 50 yrs ahead of our times. it's a bear, let me tell you. no one EVER understands why i'm so passionate about things that are just so.... (well, i call them alternative, but others just call me eccentric & wacky). lmao it's all good. you'll all understand where i'm comin' from soon enough... if you haven't already figured it out. ;)

I've got a bit of a cold. Not much. The night before last, I didn't sleep so well - sinuses were plugged, woke up with swollen glands, that kinda thing. Well, I lay there and gave myself Reiki for at least half an hour before getting up. The Reiki alone opened my sinuses and I was able to breathe. I was so grateful! I got up, had a cup of hot water with freshly grated ginger and lemon peel and that soothed my throat/glands. I took it easy on myself yesterday, although I did row 5 kms and made bread. I had a smoothie with about 2 oz of fresh wheatgrass in it (it was REALLY yummy) late in the afternoon; I'm sure the wheatgrass must've boosted my immune system up a notch. I went to tai chi class last night (was sort of waffling on it, thinking I ought to go to bed early instead), but boy, was I glad I went! 90 minutes of tai chi gave the cold a real kick in the pants. It was great. The cold started to come back an hour or so later, but by then I went to sleep (and I always sleep super well after tai chi class - able to wake up easily if I am needed by those I love, but also easily fall back asleep after) and had a fantastic sleep and woke up feeling so much better than 24 hrs earlier. The cold is still here... ever so slightly, but lots of water is flushing it out. (Knock on wood) Our family is really super-healthy, all-round. We don't often get colds and when we do, they don't last long. Only rarely do we actually get the flu. I listen to other parents share their woes of vomit and tears and I am so grateful all of us are so robust and healthy.

I've got to make a small cake and soup for tomorrow (dd's actual birthday), as we are having a luncheon in her honour, and clean the house (sounds like an exciting Friday night, eh? lol). An early Happy Valentine's to you all, may you be blessed with loving-kindness and gratitude.

namaste'
~n~

Happy 200th, Darwin!

Darwin's 200th birthday today, eh? I think about people like Darwin, Einstein... anyone throughout the ages who has made a large impact on the lives of so many millions of others, even after they have left their physical bodies... Beethoven, Mozart, Mother Theresa, Ghandi... too many to mention. Think about those people and doesn't it make you wonder, just in what way where they any different than you? I don't believe they were any different than you or I. The universe is waiting right now for you to unleash your self. You (and I)... are we holding ourselves back, not giving ourselves over fully to the wonderment and joy that is available to us in every moment? When we "socialize" our children, are we possibly restricting their inherent genius, their true creative spark and calling in life? Do you do things that are socially acceptable when you know it's not what is in your heart? Are you feeling supported by the universe - knowing that you ARE in the right place at the right time, no matter what things might happen to you to make you think otherwise? I like to, when lying on the bed, imagine that the mattress is just an extension of the support of the universe. I really sink into it, lying still, feeling my entire body supported by this mattress, which I imagine as the palm of the universe's hand. I breathe, and I imagine Mother Earth, and the universe as a whole, expanding and contracting in symmetry with my breath. When I lie there and breathe, I am connected to all that is. It helps me realize there are bigger things out there than just me, and helps me realize that I am not alone, not just a cog in a wheel. I'm here and I'm pretty darn special... in my own way. ;) We each have a gift that is ours and ours alone to share and the universe/God/Goddess/Spirit, whatever you wish to call it, is just waiting supportively by, for you and I to find our voice, to find the strength and courage to speak up and find that gift which is ours alone within us, and to begin sharing it with others. I'm not going to pretend I fully understand what my gift is yet. No clue, really. But here I am, sharing myself nonetheless. Because you never know when I might be onto something. LOL

Happy 200th birthday, Darwin. In this moment I am grateful you shared of yourself so many years ago. :)

And now for something completely different (thank-you, Monty Python):

Why not start the day with some raw museli (Jennifer Cornbleet's book) with a banana sliced and some raw sesame milk on it:

Marinated Kale ("Mediterranean Kale" I think Jennifer calls it): DEEEEElicious. Now I can second Aleesha about how absolutely wonderful marinated kale is. One day I ate half a bunch of kale like this in one meal. The next day I ate an entire bunch of kale throughout the day!

Mushroom caps stuffed with sundried tomato sunflower herb pate, and a very simple cucumber/tomato salad with oil & vinegar & a little salt & basil:

Still eating a rather large meal, even though it's completely raw. Doesn't it look both colourful and delicious? A handful of home-grown alfalfa sprouts, sliced carrot, cucumber, avocado, jerusalem artichoke, a few cherry tomatoes, a serving of "parsnip rice" with a few dried olives on top, and a serving of sundried tomato sunflower/pumpkin pate (from Raw Food made easy):

And for dessert, why not indulge in a little chocolate cake with raspberry coulis? This is an adaptation of the walnut-raisin cake recipe & the flourless chocolate cake recipe from Raw Food Made Easy, with the Raspberry Sauce recipe. mmmmmmm..... soooooooo yummy.

Climate Chaos & the Raw Lifestyle...

Many people these days are considering their carbon footprint. I'm one. I have this beautiful image in the corner of my car's rear window. Each time I look in the rear-view mirror, it reminds me to tread lightly on this Earth.

I've been thinking this morning about climate chaos/global warming, and specifically my lifestyle choices in relation to it. Often I myself feel, and I hear it from others as well, that I am (we are) helpless to make any effective change that could mitigate the current trend towards climate chaos the world is experiencing. How often do we feel like nothing we do will matter? It's such a despairing thought.

At tai chi class this morning someone had an email from a friend in Australia, where they are experiencing a 13-year drought (are you kidding?!) and have recently had flooding in the north and bushfires in the south. I look outside where the wind is whoopin' it up and the weather is chaotic - for example yesterday we had high winds overnight, woke up to beautiful sunshine & (momentary) blue sky, to be followed by HEAVY snow for about 15 minutes, then overcast, then rain, then blue sky & sun, then HAIL for about 5 minutes, then overcast.... on and on the whole day. It's cold, too... the wind cuts through the many layers I am wearing.

I was thinking about how I had to drive 25 kms to get to tai chi class, how unsustainable that is. I was thinking about how MY lifestyle choices are affecting the environment. It is unsustainable to create (and live in) a community that is 25 kms from any amenities - from the post office, from the grocery store, from the library, from the closest town centre. We have nothing in our community, apart from a community hall, volunteer fire hall, and a corner store & restaurant that are only open 6 mos of the year (May - Oct). These are all within 3 kms of our home. That is not enough to sustain a community of 400 people. So all of us have made the choice to live in this community that is not sustainable, unless things change.

It's not reasonable to expect young children to ride their bikes 25 kms into town (each way!) to use the library, or to go to school, for that matter. There has been the odd person out our way who rides in, occasionally, but it's certainly not the norm.

Our long-term plan is to move 35 kms east, closer to the city. We'll still be 20 or 25 kms from the city's downtown (we're currently 55 kms), but we will be on 5 acres, with 2 more acres shared for farming with the neighbours. It's all in the discussions. Moving will put us within 2 kms of a long-distance bike trail - we will be able to bike into town (9 kms each way) for supplies along this relatively flat commuter trail. The trail hooks up with our current town (about 15 or 20 km ride one direction) and the next town east (about 10-15 kms in the other direction from the property). The bike trail also goes 80 kms in one direction, through the city, and out to the ferries to the mainland... so that infrastructure for sustainable transportation is already in place. The property itself has a corner store, restaurant, community hall, and school, and flourishing farmer's market, all within 5 kms. Compared to the carbon footprint we currently have, I envision living on the new property will drastically reduce it.

We have discussions, very preliminary, dreamy, Aquarian ones at this point, about what the future house might look like. Naturally I want to build a cob house and dh is of course leaning towards a more conventional, stick-frame home. I have gone on a few cob tours now, and I really like many of the features of Gord & Ann Baird's local handbuilt home...

It is sustainable and yet has many of the features most people are reluctant to give up when considering a green or sustainable lifestyle... one being size. As much as I'd like to downsize our family of four to between between 500 & 1000 sq ft, I can't see the others going happily along with me on that... not when our current habitat is very close to 2,000 sq ft. Yes, this is a lot more than the average family of 4 lived 100, or even 50, years ago. HOWEVER, I'd argue it's slightly smaller, or perhaps average, for the houses many families live in nowadays. A quick Google search comes up with the average house size (2008 figure) pinned at 2,412. So although our home may seem cavernous, it is, apparently, average. Check out architect Sarah Susanka's site for the Not So Big House, or check out her books from your library. Great concept - smaller home that is well-designed, no more McMansions. :) Or Jay Shafer's Tumbleweed homes - houses from 65 (not a typo!!) to 837 sq ft. Beautiful.

Our current home has some very advantageous design features (that I'd like to bring forward into future designs). One is the passive solar orientation (quite by accident, I think). Long and narrow on the south face, with large windows on the south, it lets in a good amount of "passive solar radiation" in the winter months. (If I had to redesign it I'd put even smaller windows than we currently have on the North side, and get rid of the 8' sliding door). So yes, passive solar design, very important (to me). Another thing I like about our home is that when you enter it, you enter the middle of the long side of the rectangle, and you can see diagonally nearly to each far corner, which makes the house appear larger than it is inside. I think our house has good flow, good energy. :) At some point I'd like to renovate the kitchen, pretty much the same cabinet layout except that I'd widen the "island" countertop to accomodate bar stools to allow an eating area right there. But overall, I do like the general design.

I keep daydreaming about a cob cottage with a kitchen designed specifically towards raw veganism. Maybe I'd use the cottage for Reiki treatments or for raw food consulting/classes, maybe I'd use it for a guest cottage, I don't know. But I do know it is something I definitely want to actualize & create in the next... let's say decade.

Thinking in terms of how do my food choices as a raw vegan affect the climate, it means asking Where does this medjool date come from? What about the organic California kale I bought at the health food/grocery store last week? It certainly isn't local, and the organic company is not small-scale agriculture. It's asking Where did these cacao nibs or young Thai coconut originate and what is their carbon footprint? Although I planted what I thought would be an abundance of dark leafy greens that I was planning on eating throughout the winter, the really cold snap 2 months ago destroyed so much of it. In 11 years we've never had it get to -18 at our place... until this winter. The winds have been unrelenting and the poly over the garden frame, making a make-shift greenhouse, has been somewhat uneffective at extending the growing season much. At 48 degrees latitude, am I too far North to expect to be able to grow greens relatively continuously throughout the winter? Eliot Coleman grows at 45, is 48 that much different? We subscribe to a local organic farm's CSA program, getting a box of fresh produce each week. I feel pretty strongly about supporting the local economy, especially with the values the farm holds. The farm has had to deal with the same weather as I have this winter and recent boxes hold few dark leafy greens and lots of root crops and frozen items such as tomatoes and berries from summer. My choice to consume local organics is dear to my heart, and I think it makes a positive impact overall on my carbon footprint, even though the farm is 13 kms from my house (it *is* the closest organic farm, btw).

My smoothie this morning:
1c spinach (org California) - if we hadn't had such a winter, it could've been local at this time of year
1 tsp spirulina (don't honestly know where it came from)
1.5c sunflower sprouts (org, I sprouted them at home, but where did the seeds originate?)
1 banana (org, but definitely not local)
1c froz raspberries (within 150 kms of our home)
1.5c frozen blueberries (also within 150 kms of our home)
1/4c raisins (probably from California) & a small handful of cashews (no idea)
2c of sesame milk (I made the milk, but where were the seeds grown? i have no idea)
1 tbsp cacao powder, 1 tbsp cacao nibs, 1 tbsp maca powder (none of those are local)
1 tsp goji powder & 1/4 tsp camu camu berry powder (neither local, though I'd like it known I *do* have two goji berry plants in my garden!)

Sure it made a delicious (and healthy) 1.5 L of smoothie - which fed me for breakfast & lunch, but as you can see, I have a LONG way to go in making my food choices more sustainable and local.

Anyways, I guess the whole point to this is that our lifestyle choices DO matter in regards to climate chaos. There are things we can (and HAVE TO) change, and the sooner the better. I'm willing to move. I'm willing to seriously reduce my car use, even dabbling with the idea of going without altogether. (I say that now, LOL) I'll bike or take the bus. I'm willing to go off-grid, either geo-thermal, solar, wind, or a combination thereof. I'm willing to drastically reduce my home's physical footprint, going for the smaller is more beautiful design. I'm willing to go without a dishwasher (gasp! did I honestly say that out loud?!) I'm willing to examine my food choices and choose local, organic, raw, vegan foods over things that come from further afar. I am dedicated to my raw vegan lifestyle - it has improved my health so dramatically - so let's see how sustainable we can make it.

I'd like to have a conversation with you on this one. What are you personally willing to do?

Birthday Parties...

Had dd's birthday party today. Went very well. 5 families (10 children, not incl ours) - the young women painted clay flower pots and then planted a polyanthus in them to take home. As they were painting, the room was SOOOOOO quiet as all these budding artists unleashed their creative forces on these clay pots. It was remarkable - the intense concentration!! :)

dd helped make mini-cupcakes yesterday: chocolate & lemon & also a heart-shaped (vanilla) cake. This morning we iced them all. (Lemon was very popular!) We made a veggie tray, a few sandwiches, a big bowl of popcorn and a plate of cheese and crackers (a vegetarian party, but not vegan or raw, LOL). DS put up streamers and there were lots of balloons around. I managed to clean most of the house. :) Everyone seemed to have a great time and although overcast, the rain held off and the children played outside for a while as well.

One of the children arrived from another birthday party in town where they had a "paint throwing party" at a kids' art school. Looked like it must've been a whole lotta fun - judging by the amount of paint on him!!

BIG Thank-yous to the families who helped celebrate dd's birthday today. :)

My blog according to this website Wordle (you type in a URL and it makes this out of it:)

Chia Pudding

Here's a tip: Don't soak chia seeds in your VitaMix and expect to blend them up the next morning. Because they form this gelatinous... goo... it became this concrete-like mess around the blades of the blender and yes, I overheated the motor (again... sigh). Not that I do that frequently, but once in a while I have made mistakes like this. Soak your chia seeds in a glass jar and then pour the goo into the blender in the morning. :)

Here's the recipe (courtesy of Angela @ rawreform.com):
Raspberry Chocolate Chia Pudding
2c chia seeds, soaked o/n
5 oz raspberries
1 tbsp maca powder
1 tbsp yacon syrup (I used raw agave)
1 tbsp raw cacao powder
Blend. I put a handful of blackberries in as well. yummy.

~n~

On Careers and... stuff.

(Apparently I have too much time on my hands today if I'm posting twice. LOL)

An old friend emailed recently after reading the blog and suggested I consider a future career as a writer. I chuckled to myself, as I had hesitated even setting up the blog because of the inner dialogue I was having:
"You have nothing important to say. Why say it on the internet?!"
To which my Self responded, "Maybe so, maybe not. But why judge yourself like that? Just put it out there and let other people decide if it's worth reading."
So here we are, nearly 1150 hits later (admittedly it is probably me refreshing the page over and over, LMAO)... but to get a comment like that was really... nice. (So thanks, old Friend!).

I have, in the past, considered... well, perhaps that's too strong a word... momentarily thought might be more accurate... that I'd like to one day write a book. I've done some freelance editing work for a couple people and have enjoyed that. And the thought of sharing myself through my writing is somehow a little exciting. But again, I had a repeat of the above conversation, only a little more... a little more harsh with myself. "Why write a book?! What the heck would you even write about?!" LOL (That's where I'm currently stuck. What the heck would I write about?!)

Aren't those conversations we have with ourselves absolutely hilarious?! And so downright totally self-deprecating? :( Where did I ever learn to judge myself so harshly?! (Okay, well, this isn't a therapy session - let's just not go there.)

So, fwiw, let's write the possibility of "published writer" on my list of future career possibilities, alright? While we're at it, let's add the ones I think of more frequently (and with less argument from the voice in my head - LOL): "cob builder", "compost pick-up service", "Reiki practitioner", maybe even "Counselling Psychologist" (I have half a Master's degree on hold at the moment)... right now, my life path consists of labels like "Mama", "Wife", "Lifelong learning guide" (aka homeschooling parent), "caretaker of our home", "tai chi volunteer instructor", "La Leche League volunteer leader", and others... (none of which involve paid work, but all I am passionate about)... I digress...

I also got another email from another friend who said she has made the transition from a Vegetarian to a Vegan diet.... and she said *I* was the inspiration!! (blushing) I was so honoured that she found anything I'd do inspiring. LOL (There's that voice, only it's on the outside, isn't it.) I often reflect on my role as a parent as one of role-model. I really really work hard to be a good role model for my children. No smoking, no drinking, no drug-dealing or any of that nonsense.... (anyone who knows me is ROTFL because I'm such a straight-and-narrow kinda girl). I exercise, I eat healthy, I try to be mindful of my words... in short, I try to be a good person, in the hopes that my children will learn by seeing what I do (and not from what I say when I have moments of short-fuse-ed-ness (that's not a real word)). So I guess I shouldn't be so shocked that my friend also found inspiration through me. Honoured, that's what I am in this moment (said in my best Yoda voice - LOL, sorry, can't be too serious in life - must laugh.) :)

I bow to you both in reverence and gratitude.
namaste
~n~

Thursday...

It's quiet around here. The kids are still asleep, I've finished 5 kms of rowing (and just entered it in the logbook: 6,500,000 metres to-date!! No kidding! That's 6500 kms). It's overcast outside and really, apart from the sound of the typing of the keys, the only sound I can hear is the computer humming and (faintly) our neighbour's rooster (which another neighbour HATES. LOL) The past 3 days I've managed to row early in the mornings before the kids are up and it is so nice to have that time. The plan is to row 5 kms a day on weekdays each month - so 100 kms a month. Very manageable... so long as I don't take an unexpected week off here or there. :)

Yesterday was a joyful day. (You know, I'm secretly a little surprised at how good life is... despite any minor grumblings I might share, life is, overall, really REALLY good. I have to laugh at myself that I'd expect it to be anything but. And it's so good that that becomes the standard, and then you sort of adjust to this high standard of happiness and joyfulness and then you might find yourself laughing less or enjoying it less, even though it's really fantastically good. (Does that make sense?!) I have to attribute it to the raw food & exercise - studies have shown that exercise makes us feel better, we handle stress better... (so get out there & exercise already), and a daily sweat helps our bodies release toxins (btw, I was swimming yesterday and this morning as I'm sweating while rowing my skin/sweat actually smells like... pool/chlorine-y type smell. TOXINS. why on earth am i swimming in the stuff - immersing my entire body in it? yuck.) And raw food has such a high energetic vibration... and maybe if you're not raw you won't understand that, but the foods' enzymes are all still alive and intact.

Recently after eating a raw dessert, dh said it tasted really "fresh". Well, yes. His usual response to raw food is "gritty". LOL But I do know what he means by fresh. When I first went raw I couldn't quite get over how fresh everything tasted. Like, broccoli actually tastes like... broccoli. It can be a bit of a work of art with raw food to balance the flavours. When you cook foods, the flavours get blended together (and change taste, too, imo)...

Yesterday I had:
- 3L of filtered water with lemon
- 750 mL of fruit smoothie (4 oranges & a banana - breakfast time)
- 675 mL of green smoothie (dinner-time) - lettuce, spirulina, banana, blackberry, sesame milk...
- a plate of veggies: sweet pepper slices, cucumber slices, alfalfa sprouts, cabbage leaves, marinated beets, sunflower seed pate, celery and carrot sticks, and a piece of olive jerky :)
- an apple, a grapefruit... and maybe something else... but one of the children are up. I knew I didn't have much time. LOL
Have a good one. :)
~n~

Wickedly Wonderful Wednesday...

Another early morning. I managed to get a batch of spelt bread started (4 loaves) and then rowed my 5 kms. I blended up 4 oranges and a banana with some water for a 750 mL smoothie for breakfast and have had 1.5 L of water so far.

Yesterday continued to be an excellent day... I went to the healthfood/grocery store in town where there are abundant organic greens - our local grocery stores out here are seriously lacking in greens period. So when I *am* in the big city, I stock up: kale, chard, spinach, lettuces, parsley... I wanted collards, too, but they didn't have any. Still, it's amazing how much more food it seems like you get for $25 when it's dark leafy greens, as opposed to other types of veggies, even.... or processed food. or junk food. LOL, don't get me started.

I have sprouts growing right now - 2 baskets of alfalfa (various stages) and a basket of sunflower sprouts as well as a basket of wheatgrass. I grow them in wicker baskets that I sterilize before using. I think it was a Steve Meyerowitz book on sprouting that got me onto that idea. The baskets work really well. It's just a matter of rinsing (with an aerator faucet - cheap and easy to install)... rinse each basket for 1 minute morning and night (they will drain themselves)... and finding enough room on the windowsill for the baskets (that's why I'd like to have a planter-window above the kitchen sink in my next home, LOL)...

I am retraining myself to make smaller smoothies. Because the VitaMix has a 2L capacity, I tend to fill it right up, making 2L of smoothie at a time... and I'm trying to reason with myself that it's simply too much for one person. :) Sometimes I'll have 1L myself and split the other L between the kids, but even 500mL for a child is too much. So I'm learning to hold back on how much I make at once - I've got it down to 750 mL the last few times. :)

Yesterday I had:
- 4L of pure water with lemon
- a bowl of muesli with a banana sliced and 1c of sesame milk (breakfast)
- an apple (lunch)
- a large grapefruit (lunch)
- 1/2c raw nut & dried fruit mix (lunch)
- 1 oz clarity chocolate with blue-green algae and goji berries (afternoon snack)
- 1/4 of a jicama spiralized into noodles and 1 tbsp of raw pesto (yummers) with 1/4 of a red pepper diced up on top. (dinner)
- a few cherry tomatoes (dinner)
- 750 mL of smoothie: 1 banana, 1/2 c each frozen blueberries & raspberries, 4 large leaves of green leaf lettuce, 1/2 tbsp of spirulina powder, 1/4 tsp camu camu powder, 1 tsp goji powder, 1 tbsp maca powder and enough water to blend. (just after dinner)
- a mug of lavender-lemon herbal tea (locally grown) with stevia - (evening)

Have a fantastic day! The sun is shining so fantastically and the forest looks amazing, as the tall fir and pine and cedar and alder trees all bask in the brilliance of the sun. They're calling me outdoors. Must go...

Yet another terrific Tuesday...

... and it's barely begun! I managed to awaken myself early this morning and get onto the rower, tout de suite. I've been up for exactly an hour and have already rowed my 5 kms. I've had a glass of beautiful, pure water with a squeeze of lemon in it - I'll probably have one or two more before eating anything. There was an absolutely beautiful sunrise while I was rowing - the sky was painted pink and positively glowed. The children are still fast asleep, which gives me a few quiet moments to myself - such a gift (both the children, and the moments alone. LOL). And now I'm off to spend a few minutes sitting in silence and then to rinse the delicious sprouts...

Check out this blog post about "What is the Raw Glow?" I totally agree - I'm not bragging here, but I get a fair share of compliments as I go about my life, and I, too, am almost always in a hoodie and sweats (LMAO) -well, okay, I 'dress up' in jeans to go to town - but seriously, I don't think I *look* much different than I did before I went raw 10 months ago... I'm still battling the roseacea on my face. It's about the positive energy you project; people compliment you because that energy is so strong they sense it as a change in your looks. hmmmm.....

Looking forward to the day ahead!
~n~

Happy Groundhog Day

What d'ya figure - 6 more weeks of winter? or an early spring? Ol' Wiarton Willie, in Wiarton, ON, saw his shadow this morning, and you know what that means - 6 more weeks of winter... according to a groundhog, that is (I wonder, is the groundhog more accurate than the meteorologists at Environment Canada at predicting this?!).

Well, it's a new month... and a rather special month around our home. Out of 4 in our family, 3 of us have birthdays this month, as well as Valentine's Day, so it's celebrations galore! :) To celebrate the first birthday this month, we went to the city yesterday to see the Chinese New Year Parade. There were lion dancers, the dragon dance, firecrackers (to scare away evil spirits), red envelopes, oranges, lanterns, drumming and more. Lots of fun. I forgot to look for young coconuts at the markets down there. And maybe durian if I can find one. I've never tried it.

We went to the raw food cafe for a bite; I had a piece of pesto pizza (yummy!), dh had a plate of flax crackers, cashew sour cream, guacamole, and salsa. The kids shared a kids' plate with carrot and apple slices, almonds and raisins and some sweet flax crackers with cranberries & cinnamon. The kids shared a smoothie and we took a chocolate heart each to-go (not that they made it far!) All in all, a delicious meal. I was quite stuffed after snacking off dh's plate as well.

I've started filtering our drinking water through a portable water filter unit that we had in our camping gear. One day I suddenly thought, 'Why am I not using that to filter our tap water?!' We're on a community water system and our tap water is presently chlorinated, although we are upgrading to a UV system in the near future. I have a chlorine filter on the shower, but no other water filters in the house. So now I'm using a 3.78L glass jug and filtering water into it daily. It tastes remarkably better than the tap water itself (I'm trying not to think about it, actually). On the water jug, I've written "Healthy, Healing Water" in permanent ink - read about Dr. Masaru Emoto's research on water here.

That's all for today. I've rowed my 5 kms and drank 3L of (pure, filtered) water, so far. I'd better begin making something nibbly for the kids for dinner.

Namaste,
~n~

Update: My raw dinner was a surprise. I made nori/california rolls with a little miso and a bunch of veggies wrapped up in them, only I didn't notice that the package of dessicant in with the nori sheets had apparently opened and sprinkled onto the sheet (only the tiniest amount... nonetheless), leaving a VERY disgusting taste on the nori (I'm using up the last of the toasted nori in the house before buying raw nori; I don't know if raw nori even comes with dessicant packs). Anyways, I was quite disappointed about it; ended up composting my nori rolls shortly thereafter. In the evening I continued to drink water but then the water began to take on a very disgusting, metallic taste as well. I'm not sure what was going on there (was I simply rinsing any residual dessicant from my mouth?), but I ended up stopping that, too. I was slightly concerned I'd end up ill from the whole thing, but I seem fine (the next morning).