Well. Life is good - my back is clearly on the mend - 3 visits to the chiropractor and he had it completely in alignment - as evidenced by the wonderful relaxing stretches at tai chi class the other day. Health is great - eating well, keeping a daily food log (have been for the past 5 wks) and exercising regularly (I'll be rowing 7 kms today, about 35 mins, to make my goal of 100 kms for this month). All in all, life is great.
Having a bit of an issue with parenting, though, and if you can help me out here, I'd so appreciate it. One of my children quite regularly pouts if they don't get their way - things like slamming doors, stomping off, leaving the room, and generally displaying anger. It is to a point where it is affecting friendships, as in one of their friends no longer wants to play with them because of this behaviour (this particular friend bottles everything up inside, fwiw). I have spoken with other parents who know my child well, and none feel that this is a major issue, but some do recognize this behaviour in my child. I've been told from some parents that my child will outgrow this behaviour, but from personal experience, I'm shaken up. See, I feel like I was exactly like this as a child, so I can see what's happening here, but it's breaking my heart that the friends aren't willing to give my child a second chance. And furthermore, I feel like it took the greater part of my youth to really get a grasp on the rollercoasters that are my emotions. Only in the last, say 10 or 15 years, have I really begun to handle conflict and emotions well - oh, I still get my feathers ruffled occasionally, but certainly not on a daily or hourly basis like I recall in childhood. I don't want my child to go through their entire childhood struggling with this. I've talked about it with my child - the reason their friend has stopped calling - and it's really hurting my child's feelings. How can I help my child see the consequences of their actions, and help them to make a change (if they're willing to)? Also, when I look back at my own childhood, I wonder how the food I was eating affected my behaviour. And so I wonder if I shouldn't talk to my child about cutting out certain foods - certainly sugar, perhaps even wheat or dairy, and see if that won't help them somehow (off the top of my head I don't think sugar is a major issue, but wheat or dairy could very well be). However, I would certainly seek medical advice (probably both Dr & Naturopath) before doing this. Anyhow, your thoughts on this would be greatly appreciated.
Sighhhhh
~n~
1 comment:
I just read this great blog post about a sugar sensitive child. I'm sure many less-than-ideal foods could be involved. Sugar and chocolate are the worst for affecting my emotions, but it can be different for different people.
http://foodthatnourishes.blogspot.com/2007/03/sugar-sensitive-child.html
But, have you tried talking to your child about alternatives? It sounds to me like s/he needs help communicating. Maybe there are workshops to help kids with this kind of thing? Or perhaps a casual, very positive session or two with a counselor to brainstorm alternative strategies? Or maybe there are some age-appropriate books that the librarian can recommend, about resolving conflicts, emotions, communicating, etc.? I'm sure your child doesn't want to act this way, and while it's true that it may cause him/her negative consequences, focusing on the loss of friends may just make the child more afraid or feel worse. We all want to be better, but we have to know how... Good for you for wanting to help your child with this at a young age. Best wishes.
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