deeeeetox...

I cannot believe how nasty detoxing can be. Shouldn't really come as a surprise, but honestly, in the past 10+ months I've been raw, I really haven't had an experience like I've had the past little while... it's like it's this ongoing, low-grade-simmering kind of detoxing... what I've noticed is that I seem highly emotional & reactive - just look at me funny and I'll get all weepy on ya - and generally less able to cope with life's little stresses; I just seem less happy overall, for no apparent reason - life is great, it's fantastic, so why am I not light-hearted and joyous?! Where has my sense of humour gone - is it hidden under the sofa?! ;P Add to that a release of mucous & also sleepiness - last night I slept 10 hours solid, and this is becoming not-so-unusual for me the past couple weeks. As well, last night I had a headache (I rarely get headaches), so all this together, for me, spells d-e-t-o-x. Thankfully, after a solid 10 hour sleep I woke up refreshed, and happy(!)... (did it last? well, not so much the entire day, but still, it helped tremendously to have a fresh outlook in the morning). Today was also a day I purposely took off of exercising. Exercise is VERY helpful for managing detox symptoms and knowing I'm detoxing, I did consider foregoing the day off, but I want to maintain a high level of motivation, and the occasional day off is helpful.

I am so committed to eating raw. I cannot imagine going back to the standard diet. No way. I'm glad I didn't have any detox symptoms like this when I initially went raw or it might have wavered my resolve. 10 months in there is NO WAY I'm going back on cooked food as the staple part of my diet - I'm not going to backslide even to a vegan diet. I'm not maintaining 100% raw all the time (as you can see from my food diary below), but on the whole, if you look at the week, I'm 100% raw usually 4 days a week and the other 3 days I end up having something like 1/2 a piece of toast that one of the children left sitting on their plate at breakfast, or something - the rest of the day I'm totally raw, but that 1/2 a piece of toast, I include in my food diary (so I guess over all the food I eat in a week, I'm 90+% raw if you look at it that way - it's not like I have entire meals or entire days with no raw foods - the cooked food is always something minor in the course of the day), and I've noticed that these temptations I succumb to are nearly ALWAYS wheat products. What a HUGE trigger wheat is for me. I DO sometimes wish I lived in a hermitage, all alone (a cob one, LOL), where I could surround myself with only raw foods, but alas, I have a loving and supportive family whose company I enjoy tremendously, so I choose to live with them instead and have the temptation of wheat constantly in my kitchen. It's making me stronger, each moment I choose to go without it, right. ;)

Today I had:

• 3L pure, filtered water throughout the day, some with lime slices, some not
• 12 oz soaked prune 'juice' & 6 soaked prunes
• 1c muesli with 1c sesame milk
• a large spinach salad with mushroom and red pepper and Ani Phyo's creamy curry salad dressing (off Youtube) - DEEEEEElish
• 1.25 L smoothie - a good 3 or 4c of greens from the yard (corn salad, kale, dandelion, chickweed, arugula, whatever else I snipped from the garden), a banana, a few frozen apricot halves, 1c frozen local blueberries, 1c frozen local raspberries, 2 tbsp ground flax, 1 tbsp maca powder, 1 tsp goji berry powder, 1/4 tsp camu berry powder, 1 tbsp local honey (I'm out of dates, raisins, and agave; as a vegan, I don't usually consume honey)... I think that was it...
• and a couple chocolate chip cookies (homemade & mostly organic ingredients, but not vegan) and a handful of air-popped organic popcorn, neither of which were raw. See what happens when i give in to emotional eating? in an instant, i stop honouring myself. i could sit here and berate myself for doing it, but i'm not going to. I guess I was trying to slow down (prolong?!) the detox, I don't know. Actually, I was simply trying to avoid dealing with stressful situations that arose (ya, that's helpful, isn't it.... oops, I've made a commitment to myself: no sarcasm). I think tonight I'm going to read some more of Raw Emotions. :)

Young Daughter: "Why is called Mount Fuji?" (pronounced 'foooo-ji')

Young Son: "I don't know why it's called Mount Fuji." (pronounced 'fooooo-ji' also)

Young Daughter: "'Cause there's lots of food, probably."

They both giggle.

Today I am grateful for my very VERY supportive and loving family, standing solidly by my side as I go through these emotional moments of detox. I just loved being with them this weekend. I am very grateful for my children's vitality and energy (even if sometimes my introverted self finds it somewhat distracting or over-the-top, LOL). I am grateful for the delicious fresh greens I harvested from our garden/yard today. I am grateful for a roof over my head and clothes and more-than-enough food available to us all. I am grateful for my good health. And I am very grateful you decided to read my blog today. ;)

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