Day 34

I managed to get up early and row and make enough juice for the day before heading off to volunteer this morning. I was humming and hawing last night about whether I ought to continue with this volunteer position in the new year, especially since I would then have 5 different organizations I volunteer for (not including donating blood), and that seemed like a lot. But this morning, my co-leader was so awesome, listening to my concerns and she has offered to step up her end of organizing the meetings and taking on some of the administrative duties which were getting me down, so I feel like now I can continue... for the time being. ;) I was so glad she was understanding of where I was at.

The juice feast is going great - it's so hard to believe it's been over a month. Days are just flying by and I could easily go 90 days, I think. One day or 90, it doesn't really matter much at this point. Having said that, I will be ending it at 45/46 days - Dec 1st, breaking the feast on the 2nd and then taking at least a week to ease myself back onto solid food and slowly decrease the juice intake. I want to be back to eating meals by Christmas time. ;) But I can definitely see myself doing a feast of 30 days or even longer at some point in 2009, if it all worked out.

Took our van in to get its windshield repaired and then had to bus (and cab) it back to where our car was parked, with a carseat and two kids in tow. Hmmmm. It wasn't a big deal, but it took over an hour in the rain (& $12.55) to go what would have been a 5 minute drive in the car, so I am feeling very grateful for the car and the ease of transportation it provides. VERY grateful. Did I mention the new car has heated seats (and mirrors) and I am just so thankful for both of those features? The heated seats alone... how did I ever live without that?! LOL

Hoping you have a wonderful day. I'm now going to try and upload kiddie pics onto dropshots.
~namaste~

Day 31

Having hard-drive problems with the computer lately (never mind the dial-up connection problems on top of that). It's a bit of a challenge, but I think everything's backed up on the external HD so if/when it does crash completely, I don't think we'll lose much. Technology, eh.

Weekend went very well juicing. Been rowing daily. Did Tai Chi outside in the misty fog this morning, surrounded by GREEN (you can't see another house from outside ours - very rural). Just beautiful. Hummingbirds flitting about, winter wrens, black-capped chickadees, the sound of the surf rolling in at the beach, the foghorns sounding on the ships coming up the Straight.

Watched a movie on crop circles on Saturday night, which I found very interesting. And another movie last night on the mystical yogis of Tibet - fascinating. My son's enjoying watching them with me, too, which is nice (to share something I'm interested in with him).

Made bread yesterday, which I always enjoy doing; there's something about making something like that from scratch, the kneading, the waiting while it rises, the delicious aroma, and that my family really enjoys the finished product! :) I also completed a large section on the cross-stitch, which felt amazing to accomplish. I mean, 11 yrs working on it, and to finally see the end in sight! Wahoo!

Working on developing an attitude of gratitude: learning to stay present and enjoy things like washing dishes (dishwasher's been broken for MONTHS) and even things that would normally annoy me - a child interrupting me in the middle of tai chi or meditation, a disagreement between siblings... these things I am now learning to use as reminder bells to stay mindful and present in my own body... to not react, but to respond with lovingkindness and compassion. And yes, it's VERY challenging to do sometimes. ;)

Anyways, that's where I'm at today. I'm going to go make some juice now. Hunger pangs. hard to ignore.

HUMP DAY!!!

Today marks the half-way point on my juice feast! Day 23. Another 22 days to go (I'm planning on 45 days). I cannot tell you how RELIEVED I am to be half-way. The past few days have been very challenging for me mentally. I am struggling to stay liquitarian and away from solid food, and I'm moody. A serious grumpy pants. And nobody enjoys being around someone like that. Thank goodness my children are super-unconditionally-loving and understanding.

Today, to honour myself, which has been a struggle lately, as I've been feeling some pretty serious anger towards myself (what's THAT all about I have to wonder), Today I rowed 5 kms, I did a set of tai chi, nice and slow and really really concentrated on it, I gave myself Reiki this morning for a solid half-hour, I took time to be really present while preparing my juices, asking for blessings upon the ingredients as I washed and rinsed them, and then while consuming the juices. It was a nice break from the self-berating, ranting and tirading I'd been inflicting upon myself and my surroundings. Aye-aye-aye. Or "OY" as my sister would say.

Had tea with my daughter's godmother (and namesake) this afternoon. She's in her late 80s and is perfectly delightful and I really enjoyed her visit. I nearly completely forgot about spraying the entire kitchen earlier with juice (I forgot to put the lid on the VitaMix, hit the power button, and wowee, a full half a litre of juice sprayed EVERYWHERE - all over my clothes, my face, the counter, the window, the curtain, the ceiling... Quite comical after the fact, to be sure, but in the moment, as I was trying to get out the door to go for tea, well, not so comical just then).

I have more to write about my mental struggles as of late, but it'll have to wait until tomorrow (sorry to keep you hangin') :) DS is waiting to peruse sears.com as apparently they have more toys on there than are in the Wish Book. LOL (Don't get me started on how we really don't need more toys in this house)

Just before I sign off, let me just take a moment to say that I am truly grateful for the challenges I've experienced today, for their lessons in patience, self-discipline, and self-awareness that they've brought.
Namaste,
~n~

Day 18

I spoke with computer guy last night (he DID move!). I left the computer in the cold car overnight and this morning plugged it in (as he & I were going to walk through the BIOS set-up and see if it was still recognizing the harddrive). When I brought it in and set it up, it started just fine. As if nothing had happened. Bizarre. But I am so very VERY grateful. And I will be running out to purchase an external HD today to back up all my data onto. And a UPS at the same time, for that matter.

I was just telling my sister that last night I awoke in the middle of the night with my root chakra just alight with energy. For well over 10 minutes, honestly, it was just alive. Very neat sensation. I have been self-treating with Reiki morning and night since the attunement on the weekend. Will continue to do so as it certainly helps me remain more mindful and focus my intentions. I am enjoying, and grateful for the blessings in my life. And for blessings disguised as challenges. :)

Day 18 going fabulously well so far. Had a litre of lettuce, pear, and ginger with some flax oil and E3Live to start the day. Still not loving the flavour of the hemp oil (thankfully finished off the bottle, and no, it wasn't rancid at all), but have moved onto a new bottle of flax oil. Much more subtle flavour. So I make the juice in the VitaMix blender, strain it through a nut mylk bag (or actually a paint strainer bag from the local hardware store), and then put it back in the blender to really blend in or homogenize the oil. After that, I stir in the E3Live. I am actually REALLY enjoying the E3Live in my juices, which a few weeks ago, I really did not. At the moment, I'm probably having several tablespoons of the algae every day. I'm hoping it will turn my increasingly gray hair back to light brown, or even blonde?! LOL

OH! MOST exciting thing to share - the excema that I developed on the back of my left hand is going away on its own!!!! This is SOOO exciting! So apparently whatever toxins my body was releasing have now gone on their way (with very little or no treatment necessary - just a little lavender essential oil on it occasionally) and I'm feeling fantastic about that. I just love the idea that my body is releasing things that it has been holding onto for many years. Here we are, Day 18, and that is (quick math here: you cleanse 120 days for every day of juicefeasting, so that is.... um.... oh geez.... someone help me out here.... okay, so that's now 6 years I've gone back. WOW. 6 years ago, what was going on in my life? What kind of negative emotions and thoughts and toxins was I storing up - and I'm now releasing?).

When I think of how much *I* have changed in the past... decade... it really astounds me. I am in SUCH a better place now. I feel good about myself. I like me. I like who I have become and I am happy and content and more self-aware. I like to think I handle stress a lot better now (although maybe the recent computer troubles shows differently - LMAO) and am generally more pleasant to be around. ;) I really have to give thanks to my family, my children especially, because they have taught me SO much about staying present and about unconditional love... towards yourself and and for others. They are such a blessing in my life.

Well, I ought to sign off and get on with things. I'll check in again soon.
Adios.

Angela-la-la-la-la's Talk

Last night I headed into town to hear Angela Stokes, of www.rawreform.com, talk about her experiences on raw food for the past 6 1/2 yrs. I had planned on leaving my children with a friend, when at the last minute, she decided to come with me, so her husband (to whom I'm very grateful) took on the childcare responsibilities for the evening. It was wonderful for her & I to get out together as we haven't had the opportunity in far too long.

Angela's talk last night was fantastic. She is well-spoken and appeared at ease in front of the larger (~50) crowd. She shared her story, her journey to raw foods, shared her top tips for staying raw, and talked about the emotional journey that can accompany a diet of raw foods. I think for me I was really glad to hear her experiences with travelling and raw food (especially with our upcoming holiday and knowing how I struggled to stay committed to raw foods on the road trip in the summer - lack of planning there) and also the social issues surrounding raw food - how do you have a social life on raw foods (check it out on you tube; she's a very good singer!). All in all, a really inspiring evening.

I remember before going raw, I had already been vegan for 2 yrs. I had taken the occasional day in there to go raw, so I knew, while contemplating going raw (and I was very much inspired reading Angela's site & blog), that I could manage for a day. But more than a day? an entire week? well, I wasn't sure if I could make it that long. In retrospect, knowing I could go an entire day on raw foods has saved me. Every moment, I am reminded that yes, I can make it through just one day, just one meal. And what is life but not a series of days or of moments? That's all there is to it - just one meal, one moment, one day at a time. Next thing you know, I've been raw for nearly 5 months and counting....

Thank-you Angela for your inspiration and for being a role-model. So nice to meet you! :)

the Ultimate Smoothie

Last week I watched some YouTube clips with David Wolfe, who was making "The Ultimate Smoothie". It's actually delicious. I will share with you here what I've made:

water, I suppose I put in 2-3 cups. David used the water & meat of 2 young coconuts; they're hard to find around here and they're not local produce -LOL
1 tbsp raw cacao nibs
1 tbsp raw cacao powder
1 tbsp raw cacao butter
a handful goji berries
a small handful (~12) raw cashews
1 oz/2 tbsp acai liquid
~1 c frozen blueberries (local)
~1 c frozen raspberries (local)
2 bananas
2 frozen wheatgrass juice cubes (from ZenZero in Courtney)

Blended in the Vitamix, this makes 1.5 L of smoothie; enough to last 2 "meals".


Today I am grateful for the warm sunshine
I am grateful for a weekend alone with my daughter
I am grateful for my raw diet
I am grateful for my very nice car
I am grateful for my marriage and a loving husband