Update...

Well, after being chastised for not posting in sooooooooo long, here I am, to update you on my life. :P

Me, the vegan farmer, had to put one of our hens down today. It was *SO* hard, but she was in so much distress. She had a condition called "egg bound" meaning her parts that produce eggs were 'clogged up' (I confirmed this posthumously, fwiw). She had been picked on last week, so I isolated her, but it was to the point where today she was unable to walk, unable to move around because her rear end was so large/distended. Poor henny. So I made the decision to put her out of her misery. The research I'd done on the condition said it was fatal, so imo, it was a matter of time. And her health had deteriorated in the past couple weeks. (Yes, I'm justifying my actions) I felt so so bad. Still do (obviously) *sigh* A couple weeks ago something got into the cage that our rooster Lucky was in (he, too, was in isolation) and killed him overnight. I suspect it was a raccoon. Still, his death was somehow easier to take, emotionally. Because it wasn't at my hands. But today was different. I will *NEVER* eat meat again in my life. *NEVER*

What else has been going on around here? hmmm.... Fasting. well, I was doing just fine until day 14. Which was the day after our home appraisal which I was stressed out about. So although I started the day with good intentions, I ended up eating 3 chocolate chip cookies that day. And every day since I've had something to eat. I always start the day with juice, but at some point I just... I don't even know *why* I'm reaching for food. It's an automatic, addictive response. I'm not hungry. I'm still hovering around 1 1/2 - 2 1/2 L of juice a day. But I'm seriously okay with that.

I'm reading Conscious Eating by Gabriel Cousens, M.D. I'm *loving* it and am very open to the messages within (especially his wisdom on fasting). I realize the patterns I have. I struggle to maintain mindfulness in my life. I need to honour my Self more. So I've made up a checklist of things to do every day while fasting. Things like taking MSM, kelp flakes, a 3-6-9 oil blend (I am really loving Barlean's vegan blend), doing cardio daily (could be a brisk walk or rowing or cycling or running or swimming or jumping on the trampoline...) and stretching (tai chi or yoga) and eventually weight training. Things like dry skin brushing, tongue scraping, and reminders like did I keep a positive outlook during the day, did I fast from negativity, did I maintain a spiritual connection with the Divine, did I practice Reiki and tai chi... Hopefully having it all in checklist format will help me maintain focus on the fast. So tomorrow being Day 21 is really Day 1 for me. I'm starting fresh. Starting anew.

I had a lovely tai chi workshop on one of the Gulf Islands this past weekend. It was a day of relaxation and rejuvenation and learning. I got some awesome personal feedback on my form which has helped me take my tai chi to a deeper level. Tonight I practiced a set and it was probably the slowest and most mindful set I've done in a very long time. It felt great. And on the weekend I got to have tea with a very dear friend who moved away in the spring. So that was pretty special.

We went for dinner last night (not my idea, lol) and all I ordered was herbal tea: chamomile/mint/myrtle blend. It was very nice and I wasn't bothered by the rest of the family eating entrees in front of me. The waitress was mighty confused why I didn't order a meal, though! Funny how our society is so attached to eating and overeating, at that.

Anyway, that's really most of what's new around here. I'm just wrapping up this month's raw food order, so that's been on my mind lately. (http://rawfoodsooke.blogspot.com)

Thanks for checking in; I'll be back soon. :D