Time Alone

I spent the weekend in solitude. The rest of the family was away from home, and I had the pleasure of being alone at home. I seriously don't even know how long it's been since I've had any amount of time alone at home. A *long* time ago. And wow, did I ever need it.

I sat around.
I cried.
I gardened.
I cried in the garden.
I read books in the sunshine on the deck.
I cried a little in the sunshine, letting the sun dry the salty tears on my face.
I had a bath before sleeping for 10 1/2 hrs.
I cried in the bathtub.
(seeing a theme?!)

Okay, yep, that was me. Having a little meltdown on my own. And you know, it felt so goooooooood to just let it out. Sometimes a good cry is totally therapeutic, even when you're not crying about anything in particular - life's just got you down. You let it out and then you move on. By the time the family came home at the end of the weekend, I was ready to face life head-on again.

The days since have been grand; I feel sooooo much more like 'me'. I think I don't often appreciate just how stressful life can be at times, especially when it's perpetual stressors that just don't seem to go away. We habituate to them and tune them out, but they are still there, affecting our subtle body energies.

and fwiw, i didn't cry *quite* that much on the weekend, but it definitely felt wonderful to live in near-silence for nearly two full days, not having to speak to anyone and only occasionally verbally interacting with the dog or cats. What a treasure that silence was! :)

Blessings to all the parents out there, because it's the most important thing you can do in life to raise your child with your whole heart invested into it. Not easy, but sooooo worth it!

*namaste*