weekend horoscope

my horoscope for the weekend said something to the effect that i'd receive some unexpected news that could be interpreted two ways: initially, it might appear shocking or negative, but really, it's a blessing in disguise. um, ya, great.

well, so you're wondering what the 'bad' news with the silver lining was, eh. well, at first i was drawn to playing around with an online financial budget tool and was hit with the rather harsh reality that we spend more than we make. (oops) so i was trying to come up with a (hopefully) sustainable, balanced budget. which was all fine and dandy, except that i then found myself emotionally eating because of the stress (why are emotional attachments to food so gosh-darn STRONG?!?!) Then, rather unexpectedly, some of my emotional baggage that i had stuffed way down deep started to surface. why, i have no idea. all of a sudden my thoughts were drawn to it and bubble-bubble-burp up it comes and whoa nelly, NOT ENJOYABLE. you see, isn't that why we all stuff our emotional crap so deep?! because it SUCKS to have it in our faces?!? ha ha ha yep, that's why. everyone (whether you're willing to admit it or not) has emotional baggage, imo... we stuff it down, or deal with it in damaging ways like through addictions (drugs, alcohol, food, porn, etc.) for example... we've all got it, though - while i've met plenty of people in denial, i've yet to meet anyone without any.

now me, having a decent amount of both counselling experience and training (LOL) is determined to face the music. this *stuff* has been bubbling up more and more often and that, for me, is always a sign that I guess it's time to deal with it. otherwise it'll just keep coming up at inopportune moments and wreak havoc with my otherwise-orderly life. i also know that generally as of late, my life is getting a little (dare I say) mundane and well, lacking fizzle... and I *know* that personal growth usually happens through times of upheaval and chaos, so I was actually kind of aware that something might soon arise.

so i spent most of the weekend trying to sort through it. nothing has really resolved itself yet, but just journalling and talking to supportive people has helped tremendously, and I know it's the right thing to be doing in this moment. i started the day with reiki, and ended with a himalayan crystal salt & baking soda lavender bath. but as i'm sure you well know, this type of work is VERY exhausting. so right now, I need to keep it short and honour my body by getting the rest it needs.

in light and love,
~n~